"FINE: Falling Apart on the Inside, Nice Exterior" — Nicole Roth's Guide to Breaking Free

Send me a text and let me know your thoughts! Joy coach, author, and dietitian Nicole Roth spent decades chasing achievement, applause, and the approval of everyone around her — and didn't realize it was breaking her until a brave woman pulled her aside and said the truth out loud.  In this conversation with host Jan Johnson, Nicole unpacks the four patterns she calls the 4 P's — performance, perfectionism, people pleasing, and pretending — and what happens when shame quietly drives all of them.  She shares the difference between learning about God and actually talking to Him, why she calls the alternative the "light and easy life," and the one simple mirror exercise that has helped women start moving out of condemnation and into confidence.  If you've been serving, achieving, and doing all the things while quietly crumbling on the inside — this one is for you. Jeremiah 17:7-8 (ESV) — "Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream."  Psalm 46:10 (ESV) — "Be still, and know that I am God."  1 John 4:19 (ESV) — "We love because he first loved us."  https://uppbeat.io/t/monument-music /the-beyond License code: PLMOP0FDXHN2NOJG Nicole Roth is a joy coach, author, and dietitian whose company, Restoring Belovedness, walks women through a five-course journey from condemnation to confidence, from striving to overflow.  Her book The Joy Quotient is available now, and her new book Light and Easy is in progress. Find her community and resources through her Substack and website . 00:00 — Welcome & Introducing Nicole Roth, Joy Coach  01:01 — What Is a Joy Coach? And How Did Nicole Get There?  01:41 — Raised to Achieve: The Bootstrap Home and the Wound Underneath  02:38 — Achievement vs. Addiction: Why High Functioning Brokenness Gets Applauded  04:11 — Leading the Homeschool Group — and the Field Trip That Changed Everything  05:06 — "Who Have I Become?" Stepping Down and Learning a New Way  06:29 — "Cease Striving": The Warning She Didn't Listen to the First Time 07:33 — One Step at a Time: Jan and Nicole on Learning to Let Go  08:46 — Jeremiah 17: The Shrub and the Tree — Which Way Is Your Heart Turned?  09:50 — The 4 P's: Performance, Perfectionism, People Pleasing, and Pretending 11:12 — People Pleasing, Love Languages, and Where the Line Gets Blurry  11:42 — Cake and Icing: Why God Has to Be Your Primary Source  12:21 — Where Shame Enters: The Cocktail of Fear and Shame Driving Everything 13:41 — Shameville vs. Gracetown: The New Book Light and Easy  15:03 — The Three Characters: Shining Star, Busy Bee, and Stay Safe  16:01 — The Overflower: Living from Abundance Rather Than Scarcity  18:19 — The Sequoia Story: Getting a Vision and Awaiting Further Instructions 19:55 — Living the Light and Easy Life: Not My Thing, His Timing  21:23 — How Jan's Podcast Started — and Why That Story Mirrors Nicole's  22:23 — The Women's Retreat, the Thunderstorm Forecast, and a Sunny Week 24:46 — Who Nicole Serves: Entrepreneurs, Autoimmunity, and Spiritual Roots of Disease  27:26 — Restoring Belovedness: The Five-Course Journey Explained  31:19 — The Mirror Moment: The Most Powerful Tool for Breaking Shame  33:53 — "Let God Love You": The Invitation Behind Everything Nicole Does  35:27 — Encountering Abba: Breaking Out of Performative Christianity  37:57 — Closing Thoughts and Thanks Welcome to Just Talkin' About Jesus. I'm Jan Johnson, a seasoned believer who loves relationships and, you know, just talkin' about Jesus. Here you will find testimonies of those who God has changed through his grace. Stories of feeling unworthy because of being sex trafficked, or of radical redemption of a woman who grew up with abuse, neglect, abandonment and drugs. A story of an abortion survivor. This and more. Lean in now. Consider subscribing to this podcast, YouTube and Substack- all with the same name: Just Talkin' About Jesus! https://www.youtube.com/@JustTalkinAboutJesus https://jan-johnson.com/ https://justtalkingaboutjesus.com/ https://janjohnsonauthor.substack.com/ https://www.youtube.com/@JustTalkinAboutJesus Thanks for listening! If you have a story to tell, check out the form on my website- justtalkingaboutjesus.com. I'd love to connect with you! No, really.... hit me up!